It must be something about January. This time last year I was starting the Wood Elves, and this year the brain is gonging along with thoughts and feelings about… basically every Warhammer army under the sun. Not being made of money, nor time, nor the capacity to paint without my thumbs going weird like I’m in the middle of a bloody overdose, I am extremely unlikely to act on any of these impulses, so I share my ideas in the hope of inspiring someone else to do some new hobby this winter.
I don’t think I’d be very good at Bretonnians, but I do have a shaky kind of vision for an army. I’ve always had a soft spot for the scheming, man-eating sorceresses of Arthurian lore – your T. H. White’s Morgause or Camelot Morgana type – and such a high level wizard lady would probably be in charge of affairs. Leaning into Morgause as inspiration I’d probably load up on Paladin Heroes to represent her sons, one with the Virtue of Empathy because there’s always one good hearted friend to the peasantry (your Sir Gareth sort of figure). I see this army as being fairly indifferent to affairs of the Grail, with mostly worldly Knights of the Realm, second sons of petty nobility paying court to my sorceress.
I was very impressed by the Chaos soup armies I faced at Resurrection, and Chaos are always fascinating to play around with thanks to the sheer range of options there. I never really got my teeth into the Beastmen, and it’s the sheer flexibility of aggressive Tzeentch casters combined with game-changing mobility spells from Shadows and Beasts magic that get me here. Lots of dice and lots to do with them! It’s that or the Slaanesh army I posited late in 2019.
I don’t know why I don’t play Dwarfs. They’re infantry focused, they’re reliable, they have a conservative playstyle that generally aims for a draw in their favour as the best possible outcome, and they have no time for Orc mischief or Skaven shenanigans. They give me an excuse to affect my best faux-Lancastrian accent and chomp on an imaginary pipe while complaining about everything that’s happened since the last time I had fun (the late summer of 2006, if anyone’s counting). I have spent some time staring at Mantic (before remembering that I can’t stand them), Avatars of War (before realising they don’t do war engines) and MOM Miniatures (before… actually, I’m still staring at them). Bolt Throwers at either end of the line, Organ Gun in the middle, flanked by solid blocks of hammer and shield Clansmen and some good honest Thunderers (Dwarf handguns have always rather impressed me in the rules). Proper job.
I have, of late, been giving a lot of thought to the south-eastern corner of the Empire once again, largely because of TWW2 placing Drycha and Mannfred in direct conflict down that way and it all being set right across the mountains from the Forest of Gloom where the Resurrection is. If I had the capacity to buy and rush out an army just for this year’s campaign season, the current heart’s desire is a set of Perry historicals repurposed into the Order of the Black Bear (based in Averland, with rules and background in WD310, fractious but intrepid) and their supporting exchange garrison of State Troops from the House of Leitdorf.
I went so far as to work out what I could do with the various boxes (two small Knight units, a huge Greatsword unit, a spear block with Crossbowman or Handgunner detachments, a Halberdier block and a lot of Archers, and two Winged Lancer lines) and consider leaders (the Grand Master Genschler obviously, Father Iovanus the chapter house priest, and Otto von Grenzstadt, the senior sergeant of the state troops who carries the Order’s banner, both as a mark of respect to the County and to show the rabble who they’re really fighting for). I blame Phil A for this as he was the one asking if an army of Knights and Warrior Priests was viable. I also really like the Black Bears’ / Averlanders black and gold colourscheme (you can’t live over the road from the Molineux for three years and not develop an affection there, it’s hi-ho Wolverhampton and all that).
The odds of me buying and painting all that are slim to none with half a Wood Elf army and over 3000 points of Tomb Kings still in the queue, but it’s nice to dream – and that’s what these occasional pipe dream posts are about.
I can’t be the only one, right? Surely some of you have a favourite fantasy Fantasy army that you imagine yourself doing, one day, but never quite get around to…